I've been keeping so much inside,
I feel that I actually deserve some kind of reward for pulling it off well.
On bad days, I'll cry it out,
but a small degree of sadness still lingers.
On good days, I am happy ... but underneath that smile,
I am slowly falling apart.
Every smile takes a little more strength now,
Every day I need a little more courage.
I find myself sinking deeper and deeper into my own world,
falling, falling, unsure if there will be a safety net t catch me.
I am drowning a little more every day. It's a slow death, yes?

These walls are not strong enough t withstand the pain,
the accumulated strains and cracks.
Soon I will reach the bottom only to realize that
there is no safety net after all.